1. The statue of Christ The Redeemer at Corcovado, Rio de Janeiro.
2. Congress Building at Brasilia, capital city of Brazil.
3. Copacabana Beach in Rio de Janeiro.
Tintin's Visit To Brazil
Part A: Tintin’s arrival in the country and his first glance at the Brazilian culture.
On November 25th 2006, Tintin arrived in Brazil. After travelling for about twenty-three hours on a direct flight from Brussels, Tintin was exhausted and so was his good friend Snowy (he’s a dog!).
Tintin arrived in the big city of Rio de Janeiro (state of Rio de Janeiro, same name as the city), a city populated by 6,136,652 inhabitants.
Rio is very famous for its beautiful clear water, fine-white-sand beaches, yearly carnival parade and football.
Upon arrival at the airport, Tintin saw so many different types of people that really made him think about the ethnic groups that the country has.
Tintin decided that his trip to Brazil was going to be not only for pleasure and to see an old friend, but also a historical one; and he wanted to know all about Brazil and its people. That wouldn’t be difficult because Tintin had already learnt to read and write in Portuguese by correspondence.
Tintin had a Brazilian friend called Pedro, whom he met years ago (in 1997) in Brussels while Pedro was touring round Europe. The lads met for the first time at a library while both were doing some academic research. The lads immediately took to each other and became good friends; and since then, they had been corresponding.
While visiting Rio, Tintin intended to stay with Pedro and his family in the suburb of Copacabana (a very famous place) which is surrounded by beautiful beaches, cafes, restaurants, night clubs, theatres, big expensive residential buildings and, of course, the shanty houses (slums) on the hillsides.
As soon as they arrived in the borough of Copacabana, Tintin was shocked and astonished to see so much richness and poverty coming together in the same area.
Tintin asked: ‘Pedro, why are there so many shanty houses in this city?’
Pedro replied: ‘Because there are some very poor people here and the government doesn’t provide inexpensive accommodation for all of them; and because they can’t afford the expensive rent, they build their own houses somehow.’
Tintin thought the whole situation was very unfair but he didn’t understand it; after all, where he comes from there isn’t such poverty and such richness alongside each other. Tintin looked on the bright side of life and thought that once he’s there he’s going to learn about everything, good and not so good.
Although Tintin was very tired, he couldn’t wait to go out and about meeting people, talking, looking at the beach and getting to see the tourist places this big city has.
‘Well, what are we going to do after we meet your family, Pedro?’ asked Tintin.
After thinking for a few minutes Pedro said: ‘I think we should go round Copacabana for you to get familiar with the locals; and also for you to practise a little bit of Portuguese.’
‘Am I going to be all right with what I’m wearing, Pedro?’
‘Well, it’s hard to say, Tintin. The fact is, you do stand out with your blonde hair and blue eyes; and besides, your clothes are little bit different from what we wear here in Rio. Therefore, I think you’re better off changing into something that looks like our Brazilian style of clothing. And by the way, don’t wear any jewellery because it does attract thieves.’
‘Perhaps we should just go around the block today because it’s nearly dinner time and Mum has invited my grandparents for dinner; and they want to meet you.’
While the lads were getting ready to go out, Pedro’s mum started making a nice big dinner for the family.
After dinner Pedro, Tintin and Snowy drew some plans about the trip they were going to have all over the country.
Tintin’s encounter with a politician.
Part B: Tintin learns about Brazil’s social problems and helps towards finding a solution for them.
Tintin, Snowy and Pedro travelled extensively to cover the whole of the Brazilian territory, just as Tintin had hoped for years while planning his trip to Brazil.
‘There’s so much to see in this country, Pedro,’ said Tintin. ‘I really want to know more about the slums in all big cities in this country. I would like to know when they started, and why the government did not do anything to stop them from expanding.’
‘Well, Tintin, this is such a big topic in Brazil. As you see there are shanty houses everywhere in the big cities in the country.’
Pedro thought that the best place for the lads to go was the National Library in Rio de Janeiro (which is the biggest in the city with many resources). Pedro was constantly at the library, researching his Ph.D. in Social Politics.
‘Pedro, do you think we can find enough information that will give me a solid background in the Brazilian social problems?’
‘Definitely - this is the most resourceful library for this kind of topic, Tintin.’
While the lads were at the library, Pedro met some classmates who were involved in politics. After talking about Tintin’s interest in Brazil’s social problems, they all decided that it would be a good idea to try to organise a meeting for Tintin with Senator Paulo Santos, who was in charge of the people’s welfare.
‘Tintin, what do you think you can organise with Senator Paulo Santos?’ Pedro asked.
‘I don’t know, Pedro,’ said Tintin, with a worried look on his face.
‘Tintin, I think it’s a bit dangerous for you to get involved in a big social problem such as this. After all, it’s not difficult for them to shush you once and for all if you make too much noise about it.’
‘What do you mean? Tintin asked.
‘Well, the right wing is still very strong in this country; and we have to be very careful with what and how we say things here.’
‘Remember, this is South America - not Europe, Tintin.’ Pedro emphasised.
‘Well, I must do what I must do, Pedro, and I do not fear them!’ Tintin exclaimed.
Pedro and his classmates then organised a meeting for Tintin with Senator Paulo Santos in Brasilia (the capital of Brazil). Tintin was very confident that he could make an agreement with Mr Santos about improving the living conditions of the poor Brazilian people. He could not believe that some Brazilian politicians were so insensitive to such a chaotic situation.
Tintin meets Mr Paulo Santos:
‘How do you do, sir?’
‘How do you do, Tintin? Well, I have been informed that you are not happy with the poor peoples’ living conditions, Tintin.’
‘Indeed, sir. I think it is outrageous to let people live in such pitiful accommodations.’
‘Tintin, my dear lad, the situation that you see in this country now is the consequence of corrupt politicians who used public money for their own interests; leaving the country with a foreign debt of billions of dollars.’
‘This government is trying hard to improve social conditions, but it is not easy, Tintin.’
Mr Santos thought that Tintin would be very helpful with his European knowledge of fair social conditions, and decided to employ Tintin temporarily to draw some plans on how to improve living conditions in shanty towns all over the country.
Tintin was radiant and he could not wait to go back to Rio to tell Pedro and the others all about the conversation he had had with Mr Santos.
‘Well, do we have a deal, Tintin?’
‘Yes sir, I am delighted to be of some help to your country.’
‘So long, Tintin.’
‘So long, Mr Santos.’
Tintin flew back to Rio de Janeiro straight after the meeting to share the news with Pedro and his classmates.
On November 25th 2006, Tintin arrived in Brazil. After travelling for about twenty-three hours on a direct flight from Brussels, Tintin was exhausted and so was his good friend Snowy (he’s a dog!).
Tintin arrived in the big city of Rio de Janeiro (state of Rio de Janeiro, same name as the city), a city populated by 6,136,652 inhabitants.
Rio is very famous for its beautiful clear water, fine-white-sand beaches, yearly carnival parade and football.
Upon arrival at the airport, Tintin saw so many different types of people that really made him think about the ethnic groups that the country has.
Tintin decided that his trip to Brazil was going to be not only for pleasure and to see an old friend, but also a historical one; and he wanted to know all about Brazil and its people. That wouldn’t be difficult because Tintin had already learnt to read and write in Portuguese by correspondence.
Tintin had a Brazilian friend called Pedro, whom he met years ago (in 1997) in Brussels while Pedro was touring round Europe. The lads met for the first time at a library while both were doing some academic research. The lads immediately took to each other and became good friends; and since then, they had been corresponding.
While visiting Rio, Tintin intended to stay with Pedro and his family in the suburb of Copacabana (a very famous place) which is surrounded by beautiful beaches, cafes, restaurants, night clubs, theatres, big expensive residential buildings and, of course, the shanty houses (slums) on the hillsides.
As soon as they arrived in the borough of Copacabana, Tintin was shocked and astonished to see so much richness and poverty coming together in the same area.
Tintin asked: ‘Pedro, why are there so many shanty houses in this city?’
Pedro replied: ‘Because there are some very poor people here and the government doesn’t provide inexpensive accommodation for all of them; and because they can’t afford the expensive rent, they build their own houses somehow.’
Tintin thought the whole situation was very unfair but he didn’t understand it; after all, where he comes from there isn’t such poverty and such richness alongside each other. Tintin looked on the bright side of life and thought that once he’s there he’s going to learn about everything, good and not so good.
Although Tintin was very tired, he couldn’t wait to go out and about meeting people, talking, looking at the beach and getting to see the tourist places this big city has.
‘Well, what are we going to do after we meet your family, Pedro?’ asked Tintin.
After thinking for a few minutes Pedro said: ‘I think we should go round Copacabana for you to get familiar with the locals; and also for you to practise a little bit of Portuguese.’
‘Am I going to be all right with what I’m wearing, Pedro?’
‘Well, it’s hard to say, Tintin. The fact is, you do stand out with your blonde hair and blue eyes; and besides, your clothes are little bit different from what we wear here in Rio. Therefore, I think you’re better off changing into something that looks like our Brazilian style of clothing. And by the way, don’t wear any jewellery because it does attract thieves.’
‘Perhaps we should just go around the block today because it’s nearly dinner time and Mum has invited my grandparents for dinner; and they want to meet you.’
While the lads were getting ready to go out, Pedro’s mum started making a nice big dinner for the family.
After dinner Pedro, Tintin and Snowy drew some plans about the trip they were going to have all over the country.
Tintin’s encounter with a politician.
Part B: Tintin learns about Brazil’s social problems and helps towards finding a solution for them.
Tintin, Snowy and Pedro travelled extensively to cover the whole of the Brazilian territory, just as Tintin had hoped for years while planning his trip to Brazil.
‘There’s so much to see in this country, Pedro,’ said Tintin. ‘I really want to know more about the slums in all big cities in this country. I would like to know when they started, and why the government did not do anything to stop them from expanding.’
‘Well, Tintin, this is such a big topic in Brazil. As you see there are shanty houses everywhere in the big cities in the country.’
Pedro thought that the best place for the lads to go was the National Library in Rio de Janeiro (which is the biggest in the city with many resources). Pedro was constantly at the library, researching his Ph.D. in Social Politics.
‘Pedro, do you think we can find enough information that will give me a solid background in the Brazilian social problems?’
‘Definitely - this is the most resourceful library for this kind of topic, Tintin.’
While the lads were at the library, Pedro met some classmates who were involved in politics. After talking about Tintin’s interest in Brazil’s social problems, they all decided that it would be a good idea to try to organise a meeting for Tintin with Senator Paulo Santos, who was in charge of the people’s welfare.
‘Tintin, what do you think you can organise with Senator Paulo Santos?’ Pedro asked.
‘I don’t know, Pedro,’ said Tintin, with a worried look on his face.
‘Tintin, I think it’s a bit dangerous for you to get involved in a big social problem such as this. After all, it’s not difficult for them to shush you once and for all if you make too much noise about it.’
‘What do you mean? Tintin asked.
‘Well, the right wing is still very strong in this country; and we have to be very careful with what and how we say things here.’
‘Remember, this is South America - not Europe, Tintin.’ Pedro emphasised.
‘Well, I must do what I must do, Pedro, and I do not fear them!’ Tintin exclaimed.
Pedro and his classmates then organised a meeting for Tintin with Senator Paulo Santos in Brasilia (the capital of Brazil). Tintin was very confident that he could make an agreement with Mr Santos about improving the living conditions of the poor Brazilian people. He could not believe that some Brazilian politicians were so insensitive to such a chaotic situation.
Tintin meets Mr Paulo Santos:
‘How do you do, sir?’
‘How do you do, Tintin? Well, I have been informed that you are not happy with the poor peoples’ living conditions, Tintin.’
‘Indeed, sir. I think it is outrageous to let people live in such pitiful accommodations.’
‘Tintin, my dear lad, the situation that you see in this country now is the consequence of corrupt politicians who used public money for their own interests; leaving the country with a foreign debt of billions of dollars.’
‘This government is trying hard to improve social conditions, but it is not easy, Tintin.’
Mr Santos thought that Tintin would be very helpful with his European knowledge of fair social conditions, and decided to employ Tintin temporarily to draw some plans on how to improve living conditions in shanty towns all over the country.
Tintin was radiant and he could not wait to go back to Rio to tell Pedro and the others all about the conversation he had had with Mr Santos.
‘Well, do we have a deal, Tintin?’
‘Yes sir, I am delighted to be of some help to your country.’
‘So long, Tintin.’
‘So long, Mr Santos.’
Tintin flew back to Rio de Janeiro straight after the meeting to share the news with Pedro and his classmates.
11 comments:
Hi everyone,
I have finally finished the whole fanfiction story (with the help of a dictionary, a thesaurus, a grammar book and a lot of thinking). I've taken into consideration all the feedback given on part A, and I have improved the story as much as I could do.
I must point out to you that the pictures took a lot of my time (three hours). I found the process very difficult and I've made a few mistakes (I nearly gave up on the pictures). Hopefully I succeeded.
I wanted to put one picture after the other, but it didn't work. I realised after I had done the posting that I should have done separate postings to get the pictures one after the other.
Please, do comment on the final piece of writing, as that will help me towards writing the essay.
Hi again everyone,
I mean I wanted to put one picture after the other within the text; not the way they are now.
So, I had the first picture, text, second picture, text and then, the last picture. But I couldn't do it in this order. So I put all the three pictures at the top and the text.
Is it possible to do one posting only in this order, picture-text-picture-text-picture?
I still have a lot to learn about I.T.
Now I have to focus on the essay.
Thanks everyone for your help.
It is much better now with the correction of spellings and grammer.
I think your story will be really good if you keep up with this process.
Hi Yasodhara, your final fanficiton is good. Although I find when reading it there is not much going on if you get me, you only really have the one topic that Tintin deals with. I dont know why I think there should be more but I do. Your grammar, spelling etc is all excellent. Maybe its just me because that sort of genre doesn't really interest me. It just seems a bit boring and Tintin doesn't really do much but met his friend Pedro and have the meeting with the other man where he gets the job. But otherwise it is a good fanfiction you have done well. Also the pictures are very cool!!
Hi everyone,
Yes, I agree with you Ashleigh; the story is a little boring.
I wish I were a little more creative, but at the moment my brain is focused on trying to write correctly in English. So I cannot make my brain work on content at the same time. Perhaps one day when I am happy (I mean when I have more confidence)with my English grammar, punctuation and proper usage of the language - then I shall focus on content.
I want to be able to write without having doubts in my head all the time; and to do so, I ought to master the English language (and I do not yet). In my view, there's no other way to write clearly, but by knowing the language well.
One can only speak fluently if he or she knows the language.
It's the same thing with writing.
I hope you can understand what I mean. If not now, maybe one day you will grasp what I am trying to say.
Thanks and bye for now.
After reading your story, *^^*
I like the way how you have described the features that can be seen in the places Tintin visits. This provokes my mind to picture the scenes and also feel like that I am travelling with Tintin!!
However, I agree with what Ashleigh have stated..the story line can be a little boring to some people, why don't you put a twist in your story or an irony?
The good thing about writing a fan-fiction is that it is based on your own personal imagination and creativity. so the readers find constant interest in reading them.
Hi Yasodhara,
I just finished to read your fanfiction and I have to agree with Ashleigh and with yourself that the story is lacking of a real plot development.
In my opinion it seems that, with only 1200 words, we have only two options to choose from; or we focus on telling a whole story with a beginning and an end without much emphasis on details, or we concentrate in one or two scenes of a whole story but giving emphasis to details(surrounding, feelings, character development,dialogues etc.)
I agree that English, as a second language, is a limitation for creative writing in terms of describing and using figurative language but it is not for creating a plot/scene.
Let me suggest you some points that can help to improve your writing style.
-Avoid facts (country data)
-Most of what you wrote in brackets is not neccesary.
-If is neccesary, you should tell the reader without telling directly.
eg.You wrote:Tintin was exhausted and so was his good friend Snowy. (He is a dog).
I suggest:) Tintin was exhausted and so was his CANINE friend Snowy.
-Avoid repetition,use synonyms.
Lads,draw some plans and please do not use so much BIG (that is a brazilian characteristic :)
Maybe you can consider some of my suggestions that only aim to point you out mistakes that, we all do, but do not see until others tell us about it.
I do get what you mean, it must be hard for you with english not being your first language. However you have done a good job already and I was only giving feedback on what I thought could be changed, you have to put your ideas out there or nothing will ever be able to be changed!!
Dear classmates,
Thank you very much for the feedback you've given on my Tintin story. I've made as much correction as possible, and the final copy was posted on Saturday. I shall not change it anymore.
I think I could go on and on trying to improve my story, but I'm running out of time and I haven't started the essay yet.
All the feedback on the fanfiction story will be helpful for the essay as well.
It has been a pleasure and duty participating in the group blogging, I've learnt so much. I hope it has been good for all of you as well.
As we are coming to an end, I'm going to slow down my comments on your writing, and focus on my three assignments and one essay that I have to have finished by week 15.
Good luck everyone!
Hi Yasodhara,
Well done! We've tried our best and have done our part. Let Paul carry on with the hard reading work, shall we?
All the best and keep in touch!
AW
Hi Yasodhara,
I agree with Ashleigh i found your story to be a bit boring too. I didnt really feel there was much of a storyline to it. Tintin stories are normally full of adventure and activities and i felt your story lacked those aspects. I also sometimes felt the brackets were uncalled for, like where you said 'whome hes met ago (1997)'. And also you repeated words quite a bit. But otherwise your grammar was really good and I understand you had trouble with the blogging and english as your second language, so i thought you made a really good effort! Well done.
Post a Comment